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Thread: Why We Like The British - FROM BRITISH NEWSPAPERS

  1. #1
    Full Member Vaux-Man-G's Avatar
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    Default Why We Like The British - FROM BRITISH NEWSPAPERS

    1) Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a largegas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, "We agree it was ratherhigh for the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged forthe gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house." (The Daily Telegraph)

    2) Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole
    salami in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because shewas missing her Italian boyfriend. (The Manchester Evening News)

    3) Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van,because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branchvehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like. (The Guardian)

    4) A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teethwas rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guardspokesman commented, "This sort of thing is all too common". (The Times)

    5) At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coastguardand asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had justblown his Land Rover off the cliff. ( Aberdeen Evening Express)

    6) Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue , Boscombe, delighted theaudience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled. "He'd always seemed a nice friendly chap, but when thecrocuses came up in the middle of our lawn in February 1946, theyspelt out 'Heil Hitler.'"( Bournemouth Evening Echo)









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    [Ex]Admin Duncan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vaux-Man-G View Post
    5) At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coastguardand asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had justblown his Land Rover off the cliff. ( Aberdeen Evening Express)
    Classic!

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    Regular Member BigP's Avatar
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    Some good ones in there, think this is my fav:
    Quote Originally Posted by Vaux-Man-G View Post
    4) A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teethwas rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guardspokesman commented, "This sort of thing is all too common". (The Times)

  4. #4
    Ex Vec-C Admin Stevel's Avatar
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    PMSL at number five. Very funny.

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