Need a bit of Comedy & Humour to brighten the day .......
An 18th-century vagabond in England, exhausted and famished, came to a roadside Inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked.
The Innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window. "Could ye spare some victuals?" He asked.
The woman glanced at his shabby, dirty clothes. "No!" she shouted.
"Could I have a pint of ale?"
"No!" she shouted.
"Could I at least sleep in your stable?"
"No!" she shouted again.
The vagabond said, "Might I please...?"
"What now?" the woman screeched, not allowing him to finish.
"D'ye suppose," he asked, "that I might have a word with George?"
This rather desperate young chap took a lady of the night round the back of a club for his enjoyment, when he said to her! I need to be honest with you before I start - I only have a five pound note.
She replied, oh nae bother son, I have plenty of change
ats terrible buddo
Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent and the last instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get even a drop of paint on their habits.
After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock the door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint naked.
In the middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door.
"Who is it ?" calls one of the nuns.
"Blind man", replies a voice from the other side of the door.
The two nuns look at each other and shrug, both deciding that no harm can come from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door.
"Nice boobs," says the man, "Where do you want the blinds ?"
Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, surely i can't look that old?
Well, you'll love this one...
My name is alice smith and i was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist.
I noticed his dds diploma, which bore his full name.
Suddenly, i remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 30-odd years ago.
Could he be the same guy that i had a secret crush on, way back then? Upon seeing him, however, i quickly discarded any such thought.
This balding, grey-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, i asked him if he had attended morgan park high school .
'yes. Yes, i did. I'm a mustang,' he gleamed with pride.
'when did you graduate?' i asked.
He answered, 'in 1975. Why do you ask?'
'you were in my class!', i exclaimed.
He looked at me closely.
'what did you teach?
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