User Tag List

Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: a Logical Scientist

  1. #1
    Regular Member ade0303's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Manchester
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default a Logical Scientist

    Two Australian builders (Bruce and Eric) are seated either side of a table in a rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit.

    Phil: - I reckon he's an accountant.



    Eric: - No way - he's a stockbroker.



    Phil: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!



    The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the better of Phil and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several beers get the better of the builder.



    Phil: - 'Scuse me.. No offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering what you do for a living?





    Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession.





    Phil: - Oh! What's that then?



    Suit: - I'll try to explain by example... Do you have a goldfish at home?



    Phil: - Er... Mmm . Well yeah, I do as it happens!





    Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in a pond. Which is it?





    Phil: - It's in a pond!



    Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden





    Phil: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!



    Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you have a large garden then you have a large house?



    Phil: - As it happens I've got a five-bedroom house...built it myself!





    Suit: - Well given that you've built a five-bedroom house it is logical to assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite probably married?



    Phil: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children.



    Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with your wife on a regular basis?



    Phil:- Yep! Four nights a week!



    Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate very often?



    Phil: - Me? Never.



    Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!



    Phil: - How's that then?



    Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you about your sex life!



    Phil: - I see! That's pretty impressive...thanks mate!



    Both leave the toilet and Phil returns to his mate.





    Eric: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?



    Phil: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!





    Eric: - What's that then?



    Phil: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?



    Eric: - Nope.







    Phil: - Well then, you're a ******.

  2. #2
    Regular Member steeb82's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    darlington
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    very good

  3. #3
    Regular Member Tadpole's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    'I haven’t lost my marbles, they’re in a bag somewhere? .. '
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default


  4. #4
    Regular Member sberrow's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Newport (Gwent)
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    Lmao

  5. #5
    Regular Member JSYSH466Y's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Newcastle under Lyme
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    rofl

  6. #6
    Regular Member MalcGSI's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    E Sussex & Kent
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    What happened to Bruce and who is Phil?

  7. #7
    Regular Member big rich's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    birmingham
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Vectra gsi

    Trim : Full heated leather

    Engine : 3200

    Year : 2004

    Default

    very good lol

  8. #8
    Admin & Membership Manager bigmac's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Devon
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    78 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : insignia

    Trim : irmscher

    Engine : 2.0 cdti

    Year : 2009

    Default


  9. #9
    Regular Member ade0303's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Manchester
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by MalcGSI View Post
    What happened to Bruce and who is Phil?
    have you got a goldfish? well spotted

  10. #10
    Regular Member MalcGSI's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    E Sussex & Kent
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ade0303 View Post
    have you got a goldfish?
    Lol

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Logical Scientist
    By JSYSH466Y in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 23rd February 2009, 23:15
  2. Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist!!
    By Inspektor in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 19th February 2006, 23:17

Visitors found this page by searching for:

Nobody landed on this page from a search engine, yet!

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •