User Tag List

Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: Ozzie blonde!!

  1. #1
    On a Sabbatical
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Derbyshire (south)
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default Ozzie blonde!!

    A Blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon arrival, a concerned St Peter
    met her at the Pearly Gates.

    'I'm sorry,' St Peter said; 'But Heaven is suffering from an overload of
    goodly souls and we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new
    arrivals to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals.'

    'That's cool' said the blonde, 'What does the Entrance Exam consist of?'

    'Just three questions' said St Peter.

    'Which are?' asked the blonde.

    'The first,' said St Peter, 'is, which two days of the week start with the
    letter 'T' '?

    The second is 'How many seconds are there in a year?'

    The third is 'What was the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'

    'Now,' said St Peter, 'Go away and think about those questions and when I
    call upon you, I shall expect you to have those answers for me.'

    So the blonde went away and gave those three questions some considerable
    thought (I expect you to do the same).

    The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if she had
    considered the questions, to which she replied, 'I have.'

    'Well then,' said St Peter, 'Which two days of the week start with the
    letter T?'

    The blonde said, 'Today and Tomorrow.'

    St Peter pondered this answer for some time, and decided that indeed the
    answer can be applied to the question.

    'Well then, could I have your answer to the second of the three questions?'
    St Peter went on, 'how many seconds in a year?'

    The Blonde replied, 'Twelve!'

    'Only twelve?' exclaimed St Peter, 'How did you arrive at that figure?'

    'Easy,' said the blonde, 'there's the second of January, the second of
    February, right through to the second of December, giving a total of twelve
    seconds.'

    St Peter looked at the blonde and said, 'I need some time to consider your
    answer before I can give you a decision.' And he walked away shaking his
    head.

    A short time later, St Peter returned to the Blonde. 'I'll allow the answer
    to stand, but you need to get the third and final question absolutely
    correct to be allowed into Heaven. Now, can you tell me the answer to the
    name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'

    The blonde replied: 'Of the three questions, I found this the easiest to
    answer.'

    'Really!' exclaimed St Peter, 'And what is the answer?'

    'It's Andy.'

    'Andy??'

    'Yes, Andy,' said the blonde.

    This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that, deliberating
    the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer, and turning
    to the blonde, asked 'How in God's name did you arrive at THAT answer?'

    'Easy' said the blonde, 'Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited til his billy boiled.'

    And the blonde entered Heaven

  2. #2
    Regular Member Tadpole's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    'I haven’t lost my marbles, they’re in a bag somewhere? .. '
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    sort of faded a bit at the end but was ok... What do I know

  3. #3
    Regular Member ditchp's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    The world famous city ground
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Vectra cdti estate

    Trim : Get a

    Engine : Dirty diesel

    Year : 2006

    Default

    quality........lol
    Midlands Mod Shop - NFFC.

  4. #4
    Regular Member big rich's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    birmingham
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Vectra gsi

    Trim : Full heated leather

    Engine : 3200

    Year : 2004

    Default

    good one lol

  5. #5
    Regular Member arkhan78's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Leeds
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    great one!

  6. #6
    Regular Member Blagmeister's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Warks
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    It was clean! Amusing

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. the blonde cop
    By bobssignum in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 14th February 2011, 21:52
  2. blonde
    By whiskyno7 in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 15th June 2010, 22:57
  3. Blonde joke
    By gibbon7000 in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 29th January 2009, 19:48
  4. Ozzie V8 Supercars use Control Tyres!
    By Taffyopel in forum The 'Off Topic' room
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 9th July 2008, 16:37
  5. Blonde
    By fenderguitar in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 22nd February 2008, 21:57

Visitors found this page by searching for:

Nobody landed on this page from a search engine, yet!

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •