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Thread: Its Nursery Rhyme Time

  1. #1
    Vec-C Facebook Admin thegoldenbullet's Avatar
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    Default Its Nursery Rhyme Time

    My favourite one is the bottom one. Enjoy.

    Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
    The structure of the wall was incorrect
    So he won a grand with Claims Direct.

    It's Raining, It's Pouring.
    Oh s*it, it's Global Warming.

    Mary had a little lamb
    her father shot it dead.
    Now it goes to school with her
    between two chunks of bread.

    Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
    Said Simple Simon to the pie man
    "What have u got there?"
    Said the pie man unto Simon
    Pies you d*ckhead.

    Mary had a little lamb
    it ran into a pylon.
    10,000 volts went up its a*se
    and turned its wool to nylon.

    Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
    kissed the girls and made them cry.
    When the boys came out to play
    he kissed them too, he's strange that way.

    Jack and Jill
    Went up the hill
    And planned to do some kissing.
    Jack made a pass
    and grabbed her a*s
    Now two of his teeth are missing.

    Mary had a little lamb
    Its fleece was white and wispy.
    Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
    And now it's black and crispy.

  2. #2
    Regular Member AndrewTi's Avatar
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    Default

    Jack be nimble!
    Jack be quick!
    Jack jumped over the candle stick.
    Silly boy, Should've jumped higher!
    Goodness me, great balls of fire!

  3. #3
    Regular Member tam's Avatar
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    Default

    Last edited by tam; 4th December 2007 at 23:31.

  4. #4
    Regular Member andythilo's Avatar
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    Default

    LOL

  5. #5
    Regular Member Vec-trance's Avatar
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    Default

    Old mother Hubbard went to the cupboard
    To fetch her poor doggy a bone
    But when she bent over, up popped Rover
    And gave her a bone of his own...

  6. #6
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    1000 sticks of dynamite sitting on a wall
    1000 sticks of dynamite sitting on a wall
    And if one stick of dynamite should accidentally fall...
    There'll be no sticks of dynamite and no f**king wall

    Jack and Jill went up the hill
    For just an itty bitty.
    Jill’s now two months overdue,
    And Jack has left the city

    Mary had a little skirt
    with splits right up the sides
    and everywhere that Mary went
    the boys could see her thighs.
    Mary had another skirt
    'twas split right up the front
    ...But she didn't wear that one often

    Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet,
    her clothes all tattered and torn.
    It wasn't the spider that crept up beside her
    'twas Little Boy Blue with a horn.

    Little boy blew.
    Hey. He needed the money.

  7. #7
    Regular Member cpt slow's Avatar
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    Default

    LOL very funny guys !

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