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Thread: The way the female brain works.

  1. #1
    Regular Member VXR_DV's Avatar
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    confused The way the female brain works.

    Situation 1:
    A Vectra vxr with parking sensors in a pub car park. It's a bit tight on either side, and there isn't much space behind, but she gives it a go anyway.

    Backwards.

    Then forwards.

    Then backwards.

    Then forwards, and crunch, the lower splitter is now dangling by a couple of clips: all the lower grommets have decided that life in an oily puddle in two pieces is better than this.

    So I get the phone call: "help". Car comes out in three moves.

    Conclusion 1:
    I have to cancel my Monday customer, and instead spend it persuading Picador to reassemble the car at short notice. The whole thing is my fault, because I didn't swap the child seat back in to her car, so "forcing" her to drive it, get stuck, and smack it into the kerb.


    Situation 2:
    Her car gets four new Contintental tyres, at considerable expense. We agree that I will drive her car to a family halloween party, and she will drive back.

    I park the car at the back of a line of cars.

    It's parked dead straight, both front and rear wheels about 4 inches off the left hand side kerb.

    The steering wheel is dead ahead.

    The road is straight.

    There is nothing but double yellow lines behind, stretching hundreds of yards into the distance.

    Party over, she gets in, having had pretty much zero to drink.

    She selects reverse, whizzes off backwards, and cranks the wheel off to the left. I shout, but not quickly enough, and sure enough, crunch, scrape as lhs rear makes hard contact with the kerb.

    Conclusion 2:
    One kerbed alloy, a small chunk missing from the sidewall of a 1 day old Conti, plus it's my fault for lecturing her.

    Conclusion 3:
    There's another bottle of red wine downstairs.
    It's mine. All mine, and sod what the recommended daily intake is

  2. #2
    Regular Member Gsi3.2's Avatar
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    it's never good is it?........ wrong again..


    Mind you.. it's normally Mrs GSi shouting at me for getting near kerbs..
    Last edited by Gsi3.2; 27th October 2007 at 19:40.

  3. #3
    Full Member Jay Kay 313's Avatar
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    oh feak!!! not so good mate have a good drink tonight and forget about till the morning
    Astra Estate SRi XP 1.7 CDTi 100

  4. #4
    Ex Vec-C Admin ed taylor's Avatar
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    Vehicle : Vectra Estate

    Trim : Elite

    Engine : 3.2 V6

    Year : 04

    Mileage : 55000

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    Bet you didn,t know that women have a sixth sence...................as they don,t use the other five.

  5. #5
    Full Member Jay Kay 313's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ed taylor View Post
    Bet you didn,t know that women have a sixth sence...................as they don,t use the other five.
    sorry made me giggle
    Astra Estate SRi XP 1.7 CDTi 100

  6. #6
    Regular Member The-Bandit's Avatar
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    Dont wanna put a downer on things mate but doesnt it usually happen in 3`s


    Beware

  7. #7
    Regular Member VXR_DV's Avatar
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    hic,

    I'm staying indoors tomorrow. Might even get the scalextric out. Either way, sofa day.

    And tonight, enough Nigella Express, and Strictly Twirl Around in Spangly Costumes, it's time for Smoking Aces followed up by a bit of Halo 3 or PGR4....

  8. #8
    Regular Member cameraman's Avatar
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    My wife swears she has driven my present vectra, I know she hasn't 18" wheels & her driving no way her 14"s are scuffed to bits

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