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Thread: CSA Replies

  1. #1
    Regular Member Caterman's Avatar
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    Default CSA Replies

    The following are all replies that British women have put on Child
    Support Agency forms in the section for listing the father's details:


    These are 'genuine' excerpts from the forms.


    01. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was
    fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of
    child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night.

    02. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was
    being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can
    provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party
    if this helps.

    03. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was
    conceived at a party at 3 The Poplars where I had unprotected s * x with a
    man I met that night. I do remember that the s * x was so good that I
    fainted. If you do manage to track down the father can you send me his
    phone number? Thanks.

    04. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a
    BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels.
    Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if
    he's had it replaced.

    05. I have never had s * x with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the
    Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is
    Christ risen again.

    06. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to
    do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications
    for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right
    by the country. Please advise.

    07. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look
    the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.

    08. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him
    can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs?

    09. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at EuroDisney maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom.

    10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember
    for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the evening.
    If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to the party
    at 14 Miller Street, mine might have remained unfertilised.

    11. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my baby, after all
    when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart.

  2. #2
    Ex-Staff Full Member Ian T's Avatar
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    unbelievable

  3. #3
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    Probably the only funny thing I have ever seen in connection with the CSA!!!!!!

  4. #4
    Regular Member phil_gl's Avatar
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    lmao - absolutely stunning -

  5. #5
    On a Sabbatical
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    Quality. LMAO

  6. #6
    Regular Member ALD's Avatar
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    excellent

  7. #7
    On a Sabbatical VauxVeteran's Avatar
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    I bet all of them have applied to be on the Jeremy Kyle show as well.

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