User Tag List

Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 31

Thread: Ex's maintenance and visits

  1. #1
    Regular Member
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Norwich
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats


    Trim : SXi

    Engine : 2.2


    Default Ex's maintenance and visits

    Going through a sticky patch with the ex where my visits are being cancelled. I have made all the normal pleas that us single dads seem to do and get nowhere.

    Couple of questions!
    I pay her maintenance every month into her bank account. She does not work and claims Income benefit. She has never declared my maintenance payments to social. Is she committing fraud?

    I work away alot approx 180days a year yet still manage to have my child around 80days (24 days were just 1 holiday this year which I still had to pay maintenance for that month even though he lived with us ) and have been told I don't actually have to pay maintenance? Anyone confirm this?

    I am now going to apply for a contact order but because I work away and never now when is it really worth going for it?

    Any advice be great I went through all this with my daughter but since the ex had another kid seems like I'm the new whipping boy!

  2. #2
    Regular Member fistymus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    Saltburn-by-the-Sea
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : 1.9CDTi (120) Estate

    Trim : Design


    Year : 55

    Mileage : 126000

    Default

    Sorry to hear you're having bother (It always seems to be the same)

    Contact Order is a massive weight off your shoulders as she can't turn down your visits without being held accountable by court.

    Maintenance needs to be declared, it's a source of income.

    Any time spent with the child living with you is calculated and reduced from CSA payments, not sure with maintenance as I don't give my ex a penny, other than what the CSA steal from me every month. (I spend loads on the kids when they're with me, rather than her being able to spend it on nights out)
    Last edited by fistymus; 8th November 2012 at 14:18. Reason: added stuff

  3. #3
    VIP-Member Das's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Turdsville
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    39 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Lada

    Trim : Riva

    Engine : 6.0 V12

    Year : 1954

    Mileage : 567890987

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fistymus View Post
    Contact Order is a massive weight off your shoulders as she can't turn down your visits without being held accountable by court.
    Oh she can, it happens all the time. Ive seen countless people being knocked back visits, even after the court has ordered it.

    Can I ask how much you pay her, and was this a voluntary agreement?

  4. #4
    Regular Member keith1983's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Sheffield / Spalding
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Vectra 1.8 SRi

    Trim : SRi

    Engine : Z18XE

    Year : 2004

    Default

    Unfortunately I can't shed any light on your circumstances but best of luck with getting sorted mate.

  5. #5
    Regular Member marktaylor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    yes she is commiting fraud , but do you want to go down the route of telling on her as she will just make your life helland the maintenance is calculated over the year taking into account the amount of night visits the child has with you , that gives them a figure and then they divide that figure by 12 so it gives equal increments over the year , thats why you still pay even if you have the child fora holiday etc hope this helps

  6. #6
    Regular Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    essex
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    The trouble is tho, when the CSA finally get in touch, they are going to want to back date for all the money you supposedly havent been giving her/them. so in effect you will be paying twice. backdated money to them because they think you havent been paying anything, unless of course your ex tell them you have been. in which case, she will be in the s*** for not declaring it, when you produce bank statements to prove that you have.

  7. #7
    VIP-Member antowens's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    liverpool
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    well surely even if she denies it they can see from his bank statements he has been paying it an from her bank payments shes recieveing it so weather she says he is or isnt he isnt really going to get backdated for it as the evidence is there in black and white

  8. #8
    Regular Member nicj's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    northumberland
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Cdti150

    Trim : Sri


    Year : 06

    Default

    Sorry to hear your in this situation. I cannot offer any useful advice.

    On a different note its good to see dads making the effort to see their kids. Its a sad world we live in when "some" mothers care more about money and " some" fathers don't care too much about their kids.

    When me and my partner split up I never asked for a penny off him. All I wanted was for him to spend time with his kids. Shame he couldn't seperate Me from the kids so apparently found it hard to see the boys.

    Good luck hope it gets sorted

  9. #9
    Regular Member Swedge's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Scottish borders
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    been there done it mate, i had to take my ex to court to see my son (bitter break up)

    if you have been giving her money and she hasnt been declaring it it could be a problem, unless you have been doing bank transfers and can prove you have been giving her it in the eyes of the law you havent

    i started off giving my ex money without the csa, i was giving her £200 a month towards my sons upkeep, apparently in her eyes this wasnt enough and thought she would get more from the csa

    she went through the csa, which was fine by me as it gave me proof that i was paying maintenance. csa isnt as bad as they used to be, it gets done on a % of your wage then minus any days the child stays with you, i get my son 2 days a week so that gets deducted from my csa i have him more but thats all i am legally aloud

    she now gets £150 a month through the csa from me, she shot her self in the foot there with it

    if i was you i would go to your bank and get them to print off records of what payments you have been sent to her just incase the csa try to bill you for unpaid maintenance

    good lucky anyway buddy

  10. #10
    Regular Member Swedge's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Scottish borders
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nicj View Post
    Sorry to hear your in this situation. I cannot offer any useful advice.

    On a different note its good to see dads making the effort to see their kids. Its a sad world we live in when "some" mothers care more about money and " some" fathers don't care too much about their kids.

    When me and my partner split up I never asked for a penny off him. All I wanted was for him to spend time with his kids. Shame he couldn't seperate Me from the kids so apparently found it hard to see the boys.

    Good luck hope it gets sorted
    i have never understood why dads dont want to make an effort, my son is my world now i have him for the rest of my life

Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. maintenance question
    By triple595 in forum Vectra C / Signum Car Chat
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 5th April 2011, 20:01
  2. Preventative Maintenance
    By bigstorer in forum Engine & Drivetrain
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 23rd May 2010, 20:50
  3. Boy visits new shopping mall!
    By mitch1965 in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 28th February 2009, 10:14
  4. HMS Ark Royal Visits the Mersey
    By Brocks in forum General Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 7th June 2008, 02:49
  5. Vec visits Homer
    By DennisTheMenace in forum General Chat
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 18th July 2007, 21:40

Visitors found this page by searching for:

Nobody landed on this page from a search engine, yet!

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •