Three Englishmen were in a pub and spotted a Scotsman at the bar. The first Englishman said he was going over to annoy him. He walked over to the Scotsman and tapped him on the shoulder.
"Hey Jock, I hear your St Andrew was a poof."
"Oh aye, really? Hmm! I didnae realise that."
Puzzled the Englishman walked back to his mates. "I told him his St Andrew was a poof, and he didnt care!"
"You just don't know how to set him off. Watch and learn."
The second Englishman walked over and tapped the Scotsman on the shoulder.
"Hey Jock, I hear your St Andrew was a transvestite poof!"
"Oh really! I didnae know that. Thank you."
Shocked beyond belief, the Englishman went back to his mates. "You're right. He is unshakeable!"
The third Englishman said, "No, no, no! I will really fix him. You just watch." The Englishman walked over to the Scotsman, tapped him on the shoulder and said, "Hey Jock, I hear your StAndrew was an Englishman!"
"Aye, so yer mates were sayin'."