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Thread: Girlfriend trouble! Wot wud u do??

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    Regular Member Jow20's Avatar
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    Default Girlfriend trouble! Wot wud u do??

    So im 23 have a 22 yr old girlfriend, we been together and living together renting for 5 years and we av a 3 yr old son which i worship! The trouble is i dont really wanna be with her i dont think!! I love her as a friend if that makes sense but not as a lover! Theres no passion etc... We dont even snog! Lol and in the bedroom depo its nearly none existant as she isnt bothered! My 81 yr old grandad gets more than me! Lol. But on a serious note i cannot stand been away from my son it breaks my heart and my mum n dad really like my lass n carnt really be bothered wi all hassle it wud bring shud we part! I feel im wasting my best young years missing lads hols and other women but this is all ive known for 5 yr and she is my comfort blanket! Wot wud u do? Councilling etc is out of the question! Im only 23! And she wudnt go! Cheers lads

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    Regular Member Ben_'s Avatar
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    Been in a similiar situation mate, u've got to think off your lad first, not lads holidays! If your both not happy it is best to split now as dont want to your lad to be bought up by parents who don't get on. Best decision i made was to split, as I was so unhappy and was affecting my daughters, know I make sure they are looked after financially and I have them every weekend for proper quality time, they're happy and I'm happy which is the main thing.
    It does sound like it's purely a lack of sex thing tho, is that right? Have u tried talking to her, counselling might help, if you get in still u might be able to work at it....if u want to of course.
    What ever u decide mate, all the best with it.

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    Regular Member rushy's Avatar
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    A change of scene can do wonders mate. How about a long weekend break for your both without your son, if anything it'll get her thinking. But as said, your son is the important one in all this, its a responsibility you both have to shoulder when kids come along.

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    Regular Member Jow20's Avatar
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    Its not just a sex thing, she actually tells me she only with me for convienience of living at not tipping the apple cart! She admits if it wasnt for our son she wudnt be with me and vice verser, we got together so young and it all happened so quick! Weve been on hols etc and we come back the same..? Is it normal to not kiss at our age? We both admitted it jus feels wierd as its like we are brother and sister almost! Too comfortable! When im at work and that i carnt keep my eyes in my head at other women! If i loved her i wudnt look! Orbis that jus a man thing anyway! Lol

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    Regular Member john_k_sri's Avatar
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    Sounds like my marriage.......which thankfully ended 10 years ago. LOL

    Seriously though hope you both get to sort things out.

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    Regular Member Ben_'s Avatar
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    It sounds to me like your better off going your separate ways mate, but first sit down and decide what happens with your son re custody access support etc. Citzens advice is a good place to start there's no point being together if your both unhappy as eventually it will affect your lad. They pick upon things quick!
    All the best pal

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    Well either you need to both decide to part and go your ways or make a go of it.

    Well all wish we ahd more lads holidays etc but eventualy we all need to grow up and realise the important things, if a lads holiday for 2 weeks slagging about is more important to you go for it.

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    Full Member spennny's Avatar
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    Every relationship has its ups and downs, i know, mines was going down for a while , she was oblivious to the way i was feeling , as she plodded on thinking the exact same thing, till one day we both wanted to talk to each other lol

    We sat down told each other things and how we felt, and i for one am glad, we both made changes last year and it was the best thing we done, now married since 03rd Sept.

    You cant base your life staying there if its only for your child, he will sense insecurity , there not daft, there are loads of kids there that hace single mums and single dads looking after them and there all happy i bet.

    So sit her down, tell her how you feel and if she feels the same then split amicably, or you will end up hating each other , and then the kid will be used as a weapon and thats not nice

    As for the sex thing......... i have to make appointments for mine with her lol

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    Regular Member Jow20's Avatar
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    Roswell.. Its nowt really to do wi lads hols that wudnt botha me if i neva went on one, it wa jus an example, i guess i mean im stuk in a unhappy relationship when there mite be my perfect match waiting out there. The only probz i carnt stand been away from mi lad... We split before for a week and i cudnt sleep without him unda the same roof! Maybe i mite jus av to get used to it?? thanks for your advice lads dont really like talkin to parents bout it and pub friends jus take mick out of u!!

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    Regular Member Telboy's Avatar
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    Been there a long time ago,trust me if your not happy,which to me sounds like your not you need to get out of it as you willl end up staying and living a life with regret when you are older. Your boy will still be your boy and he will love you whatever you do.I know its hard but its life and you got to think of your life as well as others.You need to be happy otherwise you will end up unhappy and miserable and thats not a god thing for you boy to see

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