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Thread: defective parrot

  1. #1
    Regular Member ade0303's Avatar
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    Default defective parrot

    A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little
    perch.. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot?'

    The parrot says, 'I was born this way.. I'm a defective parrot.'

    'Holy crap,' the guy replies. 'You actually understood and answered
    me!'

    'I got every word,' says the parrot. 'I happen to be a highly intelligent
    thoroughly educated bird'

    'Oh yeah?' the guy asks, 'Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your
    perch without any feet?'

    'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing but since you asked, I
    wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers.'

    'Wow,' says the guy.. 'You really can understand and speak English can't
    you?'

    'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
    reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports,

    physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology... You really ought to buy me.. I'd be a great companion.'

    The guy looks at the £200.00 price tag.... 'Sorry, but I just can't afford
    that.'

    'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
    wants me cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for £20;

    just make the guy an offer!'

    The guy offers £20 and walks out with the parrot.

    Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational....

    He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he
    understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.

    One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot goes,
    'Psssssssssssst,' and motions him over with one wing. 'I don't know if

    I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the UPS
    man..'

    'What are you talking about?' asks the guy.

    'When the UPS man delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at
    the door in a sheer black nightie.'

    'WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously. 'THEN what happened?'

    'Well, then the UPS man came into the house and lifted up her nightie and
    began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.

    'NO!' he exclaims. 'And she let him?'

    'Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees and
    began to kiss her all over....'

    Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED?'
    'Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch!'

  2. #2
    Regular Member Nato's Avatar
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    Default

    An oldie but a goodie

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