User Tag List

Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: Scientists discover new element

  1. #1
    Regular Member Ste's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    ..... Driving the Jaguar XF
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Jaguar XF 3.0D V6

    Trim : Black

    Engine : 3.0D V6

    Year : 0000

    Default Scientists discover new element

    SCIENTISTS DISCOVER NEW ELEMENT


    Oxford University researchers have discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

    These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called pillocks. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.

    A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

    In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass. When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many pillocks but twice as many morons.

  2. #2
    Regular Member rod's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    nowhere
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    I LOL'd and my boss just looked at me like I was a weirdo..

  3. #3
    Regular Member parsco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Cambridgeshire
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    very good Ste.

    It would be interesting to see what reaction would happen when you add Governmentium with another version of Governmentium from another country?

  4. #4
    Regular Member jlock's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    London
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : BMW 525i

    Trim : M-Sport

    Engine : 2.5l Straight 6


    Default

    Love it

  5. #5
    Regular Member DavieVectd120's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Washington
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    haha very good

  6. #6
    Regular Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Worcs/Staffs/Westmids (ish)
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    Reminded me of this



  7. #7
    Regular Member Marcosuk's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Fife
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    pmsl...

  8. #8
    Ex-Staff Full Member John LE's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Forfar, Scotland
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats

    Vehicle : Facelift Insignia/Corsa D

    Trim : LE/VXR

    Engine : 2.0 cdti/1.6 Turbo

    Year : 13/07

    Default

    Lol @ both of them, nice one guys just made my day

  9. #9
    Regular Member 67688c's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    In UK
    Problems Posted
    0
    Problems Solved
    0
    Best Answers
    0
    Good Answers
    0
    Post Thanks / Like
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)
    Vehicle InfoStats





    Default

    Very good!.. unfortunately it's also true in both cases.
    Last edited by 67688c; 26th February 2010 at 16:18.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Japanese scientists
    By bobssignum in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 19th November 2010, 17:54
  2. Women as explained by scientists
    By rushy in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 22nd September 2010, 18:14
  3. K&N induction kit or K&N filter element ???
    By speedo in forum Petrol Engine related
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 31st May 2007, 13:02
  4. japanese scientists
    By dazzer t in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 22nd April 2007, 22:00
  5. Japanese Scientists
    By AJA in forum Comedy & Humour
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 27th March 2007, 08:03

Visitors found this page by searching for:

Nobody landed on this page from a search engine, yet!

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •